Hopey Halloween

I lurked on my darkened front porch to take this picture. Personally, I love it. It is the poster on the door that does it for me. You may want to view the larger image on Flickr.

Eye Roll

I'm attending a conference for a few days and probably won't be posting much.
I hope I can stay awake better today than I did yesterday. Wish me luck.

Follow Up to Brag Letter Post

I feel stupid to say this but "Wow it never occurred to me." People prefer their doctors to be really smart. Duh. I know I would want to have an ultra smart doctor, as well as one who studies hard, knows all the latest medicine and has a great bedside manner. I just never applied the same standards to how others probably feel about me. It is amazing how blind we all can be about ourselves. Thanks Rob, Annie and Linda, for the wake up call.
P.S. As we speak, brainy son #1 is at an interview for MIT. Go team!

Brag Letter

For this week's Sunday Scribblings I am asked to write about how wonderful I am. Here is my best effort.



Last week, a patient told me that I am smart. We were, necessarily, talking about her and it came out as a comparison. I am smarter than she is. I wasn’t doing much to justify the compliment or the comparison. It just came out. Even though I know I am smart the compliment, as always, made me uncomfortable.
I think the discomfort with compliments is commonplace. It doesn’t always reflect low self esteem. In my case it reflects some of the awkwardness I learned as a child who was identified by her peers as being smart or brainy. Yes, being smart means you get the admiration and envy of your peers. But it also means that people minimize your efforts. No A seems earned because a “brain” like you shouldn’t have to work much. Anything less than an A is deemed shameful.
I watched this process happening to my son in elementary school. He learned to feign modesty lest he be judged boastful. He minimized his accomplishments to maintain friendships. Of course, he is also naturally modest and was surprised when I told him recently that he could at least aspire to any college in the country.
I don’t like being asked about my strengths and talents. I hope that they are evident in my words and actions. I don’t tell people I am a good doctor but I hope they think so. Not because I show off knowledge but because I provide care that makes them feel better.
I especially hate it when a prospective employer asks my strengths and weaknesses. It is difficult to walk the fine line between boasting and false modesty. Say too much and you are vain and egotistical. Say too little and you are incompetent. Likewise with the weaknesses. Are you really going to say something that would make you unemployable? I have a temper, I lose things, I forget to return phone calls, or I have problems with authority figures? I don’t think so.
As my older son applies to colleges, the process resonates with my memories of being evaluated in the past. There is the “college love letter” which tells the college why you would love to go there (watch the hyperbole). There is the the challenge of trying to prove how wonderful a candidate you are without saying it in so many words.



Here is one of the Common Application Personal Essays for this year:
Option #5. A range of academic interests, personal perspectives, and life experiences adds much to the educational mix. Given your personal background, describe an experience that illustrates what you would bring to the diversity in a college community, or an encounter that demonstrated the importance of diversity to you.
Try turning this into an interesting, personal, fun, modest yet revealing essay! I hated these essays so much when I was his age that I shut down over one scholarship essay and my mom half wrote it for me. It turned out rather lame and I did not get that particular scholarship. I think my son is doing better.
It occurred to me to answer one of the essay questions out of curiosity and solidarity with my son. Unfortunately for solidarity, I decided I couldn’t post a sample essay. Given the number of highly anxious high school students right now, someone might be tempted to steal my words. I might rise to the challenge after the college application deadlines are long past. Or I might not.

In My Hand

Earthworm in my hand for MacroDay. Also lunch for my turtle, Dandelion.

Greetings from Obamaland

No McCain stickers in my 'hood. I live in a blue state, in a blue town and what's more, Obama is practically a neighbor. I have never met the man, nor heard him speak in person but my husband has chatted with him on an airplane. Obama talked at my son's school in his Freshman year. We could carpool with Obama's kids except it would waste time and gas.
I've seen Obama's house and if it weren't for the Secret Service agents I would have taken a picture to post. But who knows, they might arrest me, confiscate my camera or shut down my blog, all for security reasons. Which would be ironic since Obama's house was pictured in People Magazine recently. That's how I know what it looks like.
Security is quite civil. But Obama's block is no longer a through street. It has about as much security on it as a U.S. embassy in an Arab country. When attending religious services this month, members of my synagogue were required to present ID before being allowed into the synagogue which is spitting distance from the Obama house. This was more of an amusing novelty than an inconvenience.
My friends who live a block from the Obama family wonder if the main street through Hyde Park near their house will have to be diverted if Obama becomes President. They already can't freely access their parking space in a nearby alley. We debate whether the Obamas will keep their house or sell. Unlike the Cheney house which is not allowed to be on Google Maps (honest) everyone in my area knows where the Obamas live. A local restaurant sells t-shirts that read Obama eats here. I'm debating buying one.
No one really seems to be complaining. I think we like the second hand fame and the team spirit. Sort of like when the Bulls were winning in the playoffs. Barack is the new Michael. Jordan that is. To date I have not seen a single McCain poster for miles. There must be a few Republican voters around--after all there are many conservative economists at the University of Chicago. I'll bet they are laying low about their politics around here.
The University of Chicago is probably thinking this is even better than a Nobel Prize winner. Good publicity as competition for graduating seniors is heating up.
As for me, well, it's just something to blog about.

Rainbow

The rainbow at the bottom of Vernal Falls, Yosemite.